If you’re new here, hi Friends! I’m Cyia, mother, teacher of mindset & meditation, interior stylist, former actor & dancer, curiosity chaser and resource queen. I started Lifestyler as a gathering spot for all the topics that lend themselves to a life lived whole. No gatekeeping here!
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Ahhh, parenting. Never boring, is it? I've been there and know the road well. I’ve gotten lost a few times. I’ve had to double back to find a new path a few times. I’ve felt like a failure more than a few times. I’ve figured out what not to do so many times before I figured out what to do. I’ve laughed, cried, lost my shit, questioned myself and my abilities, and I’ve learned, grown, thrived, risen above, and I'm still getting through the very best I can.
Here's some unsolicited but very friendly advice from someone who might be a few steps or years ahead on that delightful, challenging, messy, wild, bumpy road called parenting.
20 lessons learned, in no particular order:
Never be the first one to let go from a hug. They will let go when they are ready. Some days, it won’t feel long enough. Other days, you won’t believe how long it lasts. Either way, go with whenever they want to let go.
Speaking of which — and this is a hard one — let them let go at their own pace. Let them grow, let them not need you as much, let them roam (while feeling safe in knowing their boundaries), let them trip and learn how to tie their own shoes — and I mean that both literally and figuratively. You can guide them and shine a light towards obvious obstacles but let them navigate on their own as much as is reasonable and safe for their age. They need to build their confidence and strength. They need to explore. Sometimes, they need to figure out what to do by figuring out what not to do. Sound familiar? They need to learn that they can trust themselves, and your trust in them is the first gateway leading them toward that end.